Month: November 2015

How does anyone have kids, a spouse, commute to work two hours per day, cook and still function at their job? (And why would anyone want …

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Answer by Thomas Zerbarini:

It's not easy; but, it is possible.

First of all it takes commitment, discipline and a lot of pre-planning to have it go smoothly.

There was a time when I was juggliing two kids, a wife, a 90 minute commute, two jobs and going to college online. It was challenging but it was doable.

I can't say I'd do it like that again in hindsight. I think it placed too much stress on my marriage; my wife had a difficult time coping with the stress which seem to give rise to increased health problems for her.

The kids were great and we still had plenty of time together after school and after dinner. We made it a point to dedicate that time and sit down dinners with the entire family. Also, on the weekends we would decompress and do fun things together and even go on little day or weekend trips.

A lot of our activities were dual or triple items at a time. For example as we made dinner, the kids did homework with me in the kitchen and I'd help them with their homework as needed.  And, the laundry was washing and drying to fold later.

Here's a typical day with four young kids (ages 4, 5, 10, 12) and two working parents:

  • 6:15a – Wake up dress breakfast for school and work.
  • 6:45a – Bus to school for 10 and 12 year olds
  • 7:00a – Drive 4 and 5 year olds to Pre K
  • 7:30a – Work
  • 2:30p – Older kids go to After School Program ( do homework )
  • 4:30p – Pick up toddlers from Pre K
  • 5:00p – Pick up Tweens from School
  • 5:30p – Start laundry and dinner, kids show/complete homework
  • 6:30p – Dinner
  • 7:15p – Kids play outside for a while, or we dance or play music games or dress-up together. Something fun.
  • 8:00p – Kids shower/baths dress for bed
  • 8:45p – Kids in bed to sleep
  • 9:00p – Fold laundry, Do bills, clean up a little, prep lunches for morning, etc…
  • 10:45p – Bedtime

Now, that's all nice on paper and it doesn't always work out that way. But, its a written target we aim for that keeps it manageable and predictable. If you don't at least try to plan and stick to a schedule then your just going to have chaos and things will constantly be overlooked and forgotten and you can spiral into stress and frustration–I've watched it happen and its not pretty.

So, just have a plan and approach it from a positive can do attitude and you'll be surprised how much you can accomplish in a day.

For me it was all about providing stability and a loving environment for my children. It worked and it was fun.

Thomas Zerbarini

How does anyone have kids, a spouse, commute to work two hours per day, cook and still function at their job? (And why would anyone want …

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Why is parenting rewarding?

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Answer by Thomas Zerbarini:

I can't say it's rewarding for all. It is certainly rewarding for me.

I had no idea if I would be a good parent, it was a scary thought. It just happened in my heart for me when my first son was born that I wanted to be the best father and daddy. That feeling was more galvanized for each child thereafter.

I find that there are many things that are rewarding. For me I notice that if I show my children compassion, joy and love all the time their hearts and minds will blossom. I do my best to interact with my children constantly with love, respect, patience, discipline and structure. Emphasizing having fun and enjoying one another as much as possible. Now it's not perfect all the time and there will be a need for timeouts and sending them to their rooms.

What  I have found is that my children are very happy, well adjusted, funny, playful, outgoing and most of all have a deep love for one another and for their parents. The joy and excitement I see on my kids faces when I walk in the room at school, come home from a trip or picking them up from camp is just one of the most heartwarming rewards of parenting.

There are so many "firsts" and ongoing rewards that are too many to put on paper. Here are just a few:

  • Watching them sleep,
  • Their first words and steps,
  • Their first taste of a lemon,
  • Their first day at school,
  • The first time they hit a baseball,
  • Their first friend,
  • The first time they say they love you,
  • the first deep hug you get,
  • their first halloween costume,
  • Their first Christmas when the realize what Santa does,
  • Their first book they read,
  • The first time they go down a slide or swing on a swing,
  • The conversations you have with your kids as they get more and more of their own independent thoughts,
  • And, so much more…

Simply, the Love in my children's eyes and the things they say is moving. The way they fight over who sits next to me at the dinner table and that they make me promise to give them a kiss goodbye while they are sleeping when I have to leave in the early in the morning for work is incredibly touching.

Thanks for the question, it is so nice to talk about and share these beautiful moments in my life with others.

Thomas Zerbarini

Why is parenting rewarding?

My parents are too disrespecrful and demanding. I am too stressed out and I need to talk to an expert now at this momne. What should I do?

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Answer by Thomas Zerbarini:

It sounds like you need to talk with someone. Call a trusted friend or family member and get it off your chest.

Then seek help from your church family if that is an option for you. there are counselors at schools and employers (via Human Resources) that are good starts to finding someone you can talk to.

You may find help in some local spiritual and holistic papers and magazines as well. I know that may be a step outside the norm; but, it can open the door to being comfortable with someone that you can talk to.

I hope that helps. Without more information, it's hard to give much more advice.

Thomas Zerbarini

My parents are too disrespecrful and demanding. I am too stressed out and I need to talk to an expert now at this momne. What should I do?

Is there any emergency frequency if my plane is hijacked?

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Answer by Thomas Zerbarini:

The short answer is yes, there are a number of frequencies available to pilots for emergency and urgent situations. It would be bad form to discuss these procedural and security questions on a public forum.

The FAA has published distress procedures in the Airman's Information Manual (AIM) that is accessible to you via:

Air Traffic Plans and Publications

Funny…they call it the Aeronautical Information Manual now:

Here you will find downloadable PDF files for your review. It's a lot of information; but, essential knowledge for all pilots.

Thomas Zerbarini

Is there any emergency frequency if my plane is hijacked?

Can I be hired by a major airline as a pilot without a degree but higher than average amounts of flying experience?

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Answer by Thomas Zerbarini:

I would say no at this point. It may change in a few years though.

As Tom mentioned, airlines are now in fact using computer based screening for their applications. If you do not have that degree box check in the affirmative, you will not be selected to move to the next step in the selection process.

Further, due to numerous equal opportunity lawsuits over the past 10 years, airline HR is not likely going to "bend the rules" or "make exceptions" to the selection standards in order to avoid lawsuits.

It can be quite frustrating for many with special skills or experiences that may separate them from the pack. Or, those with bumps in their past that are minimal or minor that are easily explained and understandable once given the opportunity.

Thomas Zerbarini

Can I be hired by a major airline as a pilot without a degree but higher than average amounts of flying experience?

Can I be hired by a major airline as a pilot without a degree but higher than average amounts of flying experience?

Posted on Updated on

Answer by Thomas Zerbarini:

I would say no at this point. It may change in a few years though.

As Tom mentioned, airlines are now in fact using computer based screening for their applications. If you do not have that degree box check in the affirmative, you will not be selected to move to the next step in the selection process.

Further, due to numerous equal opportunity lawsuits over the past 10 years, airline HR is not likely going to "bend the rules" or "make exceptions" to the selection standards in order to avoid lawsuits.

It can be quite frustrating for many with special skills or experiences that may separate them from the pack. Or, those with bumps in their past that are minimal or minor that are easily explained and understandable once given the opportunity.

Thomas Zerbarini

Can I be hired by a major airline as a pilot without a degree but higher than average amounts of flying experience?

Can I do Commercial Pilot License after completing Aircraft maintenance engg.?

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Answer by Thomas Zerbarini:

Yes.

One of my best friends completed his Mechanics Certificates and College degree before he seriously started flying. He is now employed by one of the top airlines in the world.

His knowledge of systems and mechanics is impressive. He uses his mechanics skills in general aviation now and helps his fellow pilots at his local airport with free maintenance advice and help keeping the cost of private pilots and aircraft ownership manageable. Nobel cause if you ask me.

You'll find you'll enjoy flying more and probably want to own and maybe build your own airplane with your mechanic knowledge.

Thomas Zerbarini

Can I do Commercial Pilot License after completing Aircraft maintenance engg.?